


Crossing Paths

by peraltixgo



Category: Brooklyn Nine-Nine (TV)
Genre: Alternate Ending, Episode: s03e03 Breaking Up is Hard to Do (in 22 Minutes), F/M, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, No Smut, Peraltiago stuff, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Recovering Jake, i'll help y'all out, idk its something dan goor said and my brain started thinking, some angst? idk, some things might be triggering
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-28
Updated: 2019-06-27
Packaged: 2020-05-28 06:20:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 3,196
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19388272
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/peraltixgo/pseuds/peraltixgo
Summary: Destined to be married in a little less than a year, the lives of Jake Peralta and Amy Santiago are ripped apart and changed forever. Is true love powerful enough to overcome crippling fear?





	1. Chapter 1

~~~~**INTRODUCTION**

A tiny explosion. A scream. A yell. A cry for help. A blackout. Silence.

****  
  


Through the hazy mist of his sore and tired eyes, Jake Peralta awoke to a dark room. It was so silent that the only noise was the faint repetitive “beep” of the heart monitor, his only indication that he had not in fact died, and was living. Slowly looking down at his body, he noticed the slow and painful rising and falling of his breath from his abdomen. A pain only that he could only describe as a “fierce and all encompassing fire” rose in his throat when he attempted to open his mouth. Because of this, an oxygen mask was placed over his mouth, and attached to the crooks of his inner arms were IV’s pumping him fluids. He wanted to shift his weight on the terrible hospital bed, yet two jolts from his sides stopped his movement. Writhing in pain, his eyes travelled down to his wrists and located the source of the pain. Tied to both ends of the bed were ropes, and deep burns formed up his forearms, cracking his skin at his knuckles that led to blood. Finally, in an attempt to move his lower half, the restraints around his ankles became apparent. He raised his head to the ceiling to cry out for any other sign of life, but the pain that covered the entirety of his respiratory system caused such a reaction that his eyes began to become blurry once again and hot tears streamed down his face. 

And in that moment, Jake Peralta no longer wanted to be alive.


	2. Chapter 2

Four months have passed since Jake Peralta was rescued from his kidnappers. Because of the noxious gases that were constantly pumped into his lungs, in what was disguised as an oxygen mask, Jake’s memory of his time spent as a hostage was blurry at best. What was most jarring? He barely spoke in that time when the mask was not attached to his face. All that was left for him was migraines, paranoia, scars on his body and a puncture wound on the left side of his chest. 

Now, Jake sat on the couch of his home, staring at the food placed before him. Walking back to the kitchen to clean up, his fiance Amy had made him a simple lunch: a sandwich. Three simple parts; bread, jelly and peanut butter, would seem elementary to most. However, the composition of this meal startled Jake and he did not know how to approach it. The therapists and psychologists lectured Amy time and time again on how difficult the reintroduction into society would be for her love. She listened, took the most detailed notes and created a plan, but even Amy Santiago was not prepared for the reality of the struggle.

A task as basic as eating a meal was a mental marathon for Jake. After being forced to eat his food off the floor, hands tied and monitored 24/7 during his time “there”(as he calls it), being given solid food on a plate, was too overstimulating for him. 

Noticing the silence that still remained in the living room, indicating that Jake had not begun to eat, Amy put down the dishes she was beginning to wash. 

She made her way back to the couch and sat next to Jake, making sure that she didn’t get too close. Swallowing down her fear for the 100th time, Amy gently looked at Jake. He was still staring down at the food on his plate, sweating from the top of his head and his heads beginning to shake. According to the thorough plan created by the therapists and Amy, Jake should begin to be reacquainted with solid foods; starting with those that were soft. Jake, in true child form, still was a very picky eater, so choosing foods for him to begin eating again that fit the criteria was extremely difficult. 

Those two minutes just staring at Jake felt like two years had passed by. Not being able to take it any longer, Amy quietly whispered to Jake: “Jake, it’s okay. I’m right here. You’re hungry and I know you love PB&J.”  
He looked up at her, with lost brown eyes as his lips quivered. “It’s so big Amy, I- I can’t pick it up and eat it,” he whispered back.   
She had cut the sandwich in half, the crust of course also being cut off. Taking the plate out of his hands for fear that Jake might drop it on their new carpet, Amy retired back to the kitchen. About three minutes later she was back, with the sandwich now cut into little pieces.

“Here Jake, it is the same sandwich, just in smaller bites. Does that help? I can hear your stomach growling from here, you need to eat,” Amy said. 

His expression softened a bit, and his eyes became pensive; the new version of the sandwich was like a whole new world. He took the plate out of her hands, placed it in his lap and slowly took one piece in his hand. After about a minute, Jake began to eat.

Maintaining constant eye contact with him, yet still keeping distance, Amy’s face grew into a smile. She didn’t say anything more, she just watched as Jake methodically and tenderly ate every single piece of the sandwich on the plate. The color in his face changed during those ten minutes, and some of the pink in his cheeks began to reappear. Once he was done, he looked up and placed the empty plate on the coffee table.

“Well, we both know you can’t cook that well, but that sandwich was five star material Ames,” Jake joked. A slight smile formed across his lips as he stood up and stretched.   
“Hey! I am getting better at cooking, Charles has been helping me and soon enough I’ll be able to whip up anything you want,” Amy answered back, slowly walking towards Jake. 

The two did not physically touch each other often, as that was also too overstimulating for Jake. But here and there, a hand hold or a backrub reminded each other of the warmth of the skin to skin contact and the love they felt for one another. 

Jake and Amy stared at each other before they both started to laugh, for the awkwardness of the silence and the notion of Amy being able to cook?! That was crazy.

Suddenly, the alarm on Amy’s phone went off: it was 2pm. Looking back up at Jake and then turning around towards their apartment door, she called out to Jake: “Well would you look at the time, it’s two. Come on Jake, let’s go for a walk.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sandwich content! We stan? Anyways I love Jake Peralta with all of my heart, leave our baby some love.


	3. Chapter 3

The biggest setback for Jake has been his trouble with developing a regular breathing pattern once again. Coupled with the stab wound puncturing his left lung, daily activities have become a major chore. 

Besides being prescribed a plethora of pills and steroid filled inhalers to combat the most difficult points, the doctors added walking to his therapy. It seemed very basic to Amy when they first told her. Shouldn’t he be in physical therapy working to strengthen his body with a licensed doctor and not...her? 

“Jake will want to get better as soon as possible, he’s going to find the walking boring and want to over exert himself!” Amy exclaimed to Jake’s medical team.   
“Ms. Santiago, you must keep your fiancé’s condition in mind. He lived in isolation and darkness, speaking to virtually no one for six months. He mentally cannot take being around any other person right now. You are the gateway for him to be open to doing the bare minimum of therapy,” they explained to her. 

They may not be able to see it, but Amy knew in her heart that Jake wanted to get back to normal as soon as possible. After all, when Jake was rescued and admitted to the hospital, it was October 15th. Their wedding was supposed to occur in exactly seven months. 

**  
It was now February 15th, the wedding still supposed to be happening in three months. However, all of the planning Amy had began the moment the two got engaged was basically out of sight and out of mind. She longer thought about that date literally at all. Jake’s physical and mental health were her number one priority, so much so that she decided to begin working part time to be with him as much as possible, yet still make an income.

Since Jake was released from the hospital, the two would take a walk together every day. Besides it being an opportunity for Jake to focus on his breathing while minorly exerting himself, a counselor working with couples in crisis believed taking a walk would help to rebuild their relationship. It was not like Jake and Amy no longer loved each other, but there was a gaping hole between the two that clearly needed mending.   
The walks first started out as a ten minute activity. Jake and Amy would walk to the corner of their block, turn around, and come back. Easy for Amy, however, Jake constantly needed to stop, use his inhaler and sit down. 

Also, the occasional Brooklyn passerby on the street would send Jake into an immediate panic, for fear that this stranger would harm him as he was when he was “there”. 

After careful investigation by sergeant Santiago, her uniformed officers and the rest of the 99th precinct, they determined the “safest” time for Jake and Amy to take a walk was at 7:30pm. Also, beginning basic therapy would aid Jake in focusing on his body and not being distracted by the light of day, as his eyes and body were still getting accustomed to the rhythm of “day and night”. 

These short evening walks proved successful, and Jake seemed to respond very well. So, the lengths of the walks increased, and conversation between the two became more natural. For the first two weeks, the two walked in silence and said nothing to each other; an exception was when Amy would attempt to calm Jake down during an anxiety attack. 

But now, here in February, the daily walk was over an hour. Jake had become accustomed to the normal flow of a twenty hour cycle, and would only panic when directly addressed by someone or provoked by an animal that came up to him abruptly. So, a mid afternoon walk, weather permitting, became the norm for the couple.

Taking advantage of the beautiful scenery that filled their neighborhood, Jake and Amy charted their usual course. The harsh cold of a New York February immediately hit their faces as they walked outside. All bundled up, the two headed down the steps and were on their way.

Walking past shops and various parks, today Jake and Amy were careful to not slip on the ice that coated the Brooklyn blocks from the dip in temperatures after a rainstorm. A daunting task, especially for Jake, who was battling the sharp daggers of the cold stabbing at the area of the wound and the burn of the bitter wind in his throat. But, he was succeeding today, and Amy seemed to be the one having trouble...or maybe just bad luck.

Every ten steps, she was slipping around like a penguin learning how to walk for the first time. Laughing with every step she took, yet slightly embarrassed at how clumsy she appeared, Amy decided to take a big step. She locked arms with Jake to support herself and regain balance, but he momentarily froze as their arms intertwined. He coughed as he stopped and stared wide eyed at them. 

“I’m sorry Jake, this ice is being a bitch right now and unless we just walk in the street I’m going to end up face planting. Maybe this was a bad idea today with the weather, let’s turn around and go-,” she began. Jake cleared his throat and she stopped mid sentence. 

“No Amy, we gotta keep walking! We haven’t gotten to the window of the pet store yet and I want to say hello to the puppies and birds,” he whined. “Keep a hold of me, I’ll support you,” Jake told her with shaky confidence. 

Amy could not believe what she was hearing. HER Jake, just said he wanted to continue on?! Wow. But the most surprising remained that for the rest of the walk the two walked close together, arm in arm commenting on some of their favorite childhood memories of the winter. Jake only stopped once to rest after holding conversation for an extended period of time while walking: a major step he was recently instructed to work on.

By the time the two returned home, it was almost 5pm. Jake was virtually wiped out from all that he had done during that walk. But, he was proud of himself and even joked around a bit when walking back inside.

“Hey Santiago! Sick dance moves out there on the ice,” as he imitated Amy slipping and flailing her arms. 

She playfully folded her arms and pouted as she watched Jake. “Hey, I could have gotten hurt out there, black ice is a serious issue and causes thousands of injuries and car accidents every winter!” 

Slightly shaking his head while yawning, Jake expressed her craziness and announced he was going to go to their room and take a nap. 

“Go sleep Peralta, I’m going to start us dinner. How does some macaroni and cheese sound?” she called out to him halfway down the hall.  
“Sounds great Bambi!” he shouted back and proceeded to close their door. Chuckling to herself, Amy walked into the kitchen and started preparing dinner.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, my chapters are short. I'm going to be practicing on making them longer, I promise!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **trigger warning** panic attacks

It was still February, but spring weather decided to make an appearance in Brooklyn for about a week. With the warm up, Jake and Amy’s walks became less dangerous avoiding ice and the frigid cold. The snow around them was melting, and the crocuses were popping up from the earth. 

On a particularly mild Saturday afternoon, Amy suggested a different route from their usual one. Normally, they walk east of their home, in the direction of the precinct. But today, at a specific corner, Amy tugged at Jake’s jacket sleeve as he rounded the corner the usual way. Confused, he asked: “What’s up Ames? We’re at 35th avenue, we gotta turn right now.” She half smiled, eyes widening.   
“Jake, we always walk the same way. Yes, the route has extended, but it’s still in the same neighborhood. The same streets, the same stores, the same trees. Let’s explore somewhere new!” she said. 

Jake hesitated for a moment. A pit in his stomach began to form as he watched as Amy’s excitement grew with every word she said; something in him left his feet cemented to the ground. The routine had become so normal and the walk was a huge part of this.   
His confidence was definitely missing the swagger he once exuded, but Jake would occasionally crack some minor jokes and have random outbursts that would have once made Amy roll her eyes so hard they would have fallen out of her skull.

Jake’s progress was still about the same, though he was really improving in his social communication. He made it a point to try and talk to Amy as much as he could, the only time silence filled his life again was when she went to work. But, he understood she needed to go; since he was out of the line of duty indefinitely. Jake’s brain would race the entire time she was gone, all of his thoughts placed on a high speed conveyor belt. Fear, shame and doubt would overcome all of his emotions, not knowing how to cope with the stress of being alone again without panicking.

The normalcy of a walk and the familiarity aided in what Jake began to regard as “home” once again. All of these thoughts charged through Jake’s mind, but this mental game he played, on the corner of the street was surely taking a toll on his physical appearance. His vision blurred and his breathing intensified, becoming erratic and frantic. He looked down at his knees, which were beginning to quietly shake.

Amy’s face turned from excited to concerned in about five seconds. In an instant, she was at Jake’s side, guiding him on the street to find the nearest stoop to calm down. This was the first panic attack Jake had suffered while on a walk in a month. 

**  
Twenty minutes had gone by, and Jake’s breathing had regulated. His head was resting on Amy’s shoulder, as she stroked his brunette curls and rubbed his neck. She spoke softly to him, as quiet tears streamed down her face. “Jake, it is going to be okay. I thought we could try something new, you have been doing so well.” 

“This is all my fault...” Amy trailed off after uttering that last sentence.

Jake didn’t respond, as he focused on the blades of grass across the sidewalk as his body lightly shook. The shaking melted away, and the regular rise and fall of his breath returned as Amy spoke to him. However, when she trailed off, Jake looked up at his love. Her cheeks were stained, eyes puffy and red. She sniffled as he took his thumb and wiped a tear away that was falling down her face. 

Amy’s body froze and sort of trembled from the touch and her eyes locked with his. Jake had not touched her in such a way since that night, when he was taken away.   
“Jake-”, she began, but couldn’t muster another word. He removed his thumb from her face, and placed his arm on her lap. 

“Amy, everything is slowly going back to normal. I love our walks, they are my favorite part of the day, you know that. The familiarity of the route is like training a puppy, the repetitiveness assuring and safe,” Jake said to her. 

Almost in a whisper, Jake still maintaining steady eye contact, uttered: “There is so much I want to explore and discover with you, for the rest of my life. You make me whole, every day. And I have never felt safe and confident enough in myself to say thank you. Thank you for all you have done for me, when I was “there”, when I was rescued, and when I came home. Thank you for your good morning smiles, warm tea and tender hugs, your little nose that scrunches up when you tell me good news from the day or share a memory. Thank you for your patience and love, it is everything.”

Holding her breath since Jake opened his mouth, Amy removed her hand from his hair and placed it over her mouth. Tears began to stream down her face again, but these were different. Her heart soared with love and gratitude, as emotions got the best of her.

Again, Jake whispered: “Amy Santiago, I love you so much.” And after a pause, he continued. “Let’s go explore and take a walk.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jake is so strong UGH I love him. Writing this side of their relationship is like, amazing? I'm really a fan.


End file.
